Life is this grandiose fountain of treasures that has no room for boredom. Most people fill their lives with anything to keep their mind away from their mind. I don’t. I like thinking. Sometimes, my own thoughts can be predictable or have tendencies to surf around the same topic. It’s not that I don’t let go, I do. But I need clarity and full excitement in life. I keep struggling with this enormous hunger for profound ‘things’ that make my own existence challenging and bearable in the same time. While enjoying ‘do nothing’ type of days, that hunger strikes so very often and it takes charge. Parts of my being roars like there is no tomorrow while the other part reserves room for peaceful night of sleep. I can’t settle for ordinary. I wasn’t born that way. I crave that absolute thrill that each encounter electrifies my soul. I am not the type of woman that thrives through preserving good memories in attempt to substitute for what is real. I don’t care if you, you, and you are judging me or throwing in your two cents. I care deeply for those who resonate with me. People whose world is not wrapped around their fallse facades are my team. I am not afraid of exploring my failures, sexuality, random bullshit, wasted time, and gained wisdoms, mistakes, adorable gestures…etc. That is how I was build. If you are seating there, pointing a finger at any of my life experiences, look at me in the eye and make sure your ears are uncovered because I will say this once; FUCK YOU! Yep, you read that right! I am not a people pleaser, nor do I care to be popular by your standards. Life been good and bad to me, yet I stand tall. I don’t settle for ordinary. Ordinary conversations, ordinary lives, ordinary thought process, ordinary job, ordinary lifestyle, ordinary sex, ordinary love, ordinary gathering, ordinary bullshit….get that shit away from me. Impress me! Fascinate me with your brilliant corners of your mind. Only then maybe, we can talk.
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December 2016
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